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How to make the most insanely beautiful chunky knit blanket in the history of ever

How to make theeee most insanely beautiful chunky knit blanket in the history of ever

I’m almost speechless.

I said almost, don’t get too giddy.

 Everything you need to make a chunky wool blanket is here!  These chunky knit blanket kits are beyond perfect and luscious and sexy and you’ll want to hug your blanket and call it Betty. Or Veronica. Or Clara.

Okay. We named our blanket patterns after our Grandma’s.  Legit.  Because we love our Nana’s and totally appreciate the art of living life in the slow lane.

Knitting forever, housework whenever via Lynne Knowlton | DESIGN THE LIFE YOU WANT TO LIVE

Today, I’m keeping it brief, not to be confused with showing you my briefs, which might make things kinda awkward between us.

You and I are more than friends. We are like a really small knitting gang.

 AND we have some knitting to do.

Chunky wool knit blanket kits are here!

I super hollered that ^^^^^ !!!!!!%$#@##$%%

I like to party. and by party, I mean knit.

My latest chunky knit patterns that sooooo many of you have been asking for are finally here!!  It only took me 43897498457 hours to get the knit collection set up in the blog shop.

I’m an excellent procrastinator.

Knitting unwinds me and keeps me from unravelling << See what I just did there?!

I have a lot of chunky wool blankets in my home.

Like, a lot.

No really, a LOT LOT.

Originally, setting up my blog shop was during my kitchen renovation (kill me.) That was also a time when I constantly felt like throwing a cocktail in someone’s face. (Or curling up in a dark corner and crying.) And hello Michaels cancer.  Cancer has a way of punching you in the feelings.

It’s at these exact times in my life where I read stacks of trashy magazines, binge-watch Netflix shows, write super boring scintillating blog posts + create chunky wool blanket kits … because the more FUN I pour into my work, the happier my soul becomes.  Did I just sound like a corn dog?  Don’t answer that. It wasn’t a real question.

Erhmergerd *drinks vodka from flask in desk drawer.

It takes balls to knit.

Knitters gonna knit.  Therefore you are my fave person.

Chunky knit blanket.  How is this even REAL?

Knit your own chunky knit blanket ! Fabulous patterns, wool, knitting needles and chunky knit blanket kits via Lynne Knowlton | DESIGN THE LIFE YOU WANT TO LIVE

Remember this photo ^^^ that I posted recently on Instagram?

And yes, that’s an enormo amount of throw pillows on my bed, why do you ask?

I   H A D   A   R O U G H   W E E K 

I woke up one day a couple of weeks ago and was like…WHOA! I know what I must do. I must put chunky wool blanket kits on my blog. My coffee was strong. In hindsight, perhaps I should have spiked my coffee.  Yes.  Most definitely. Why the hell didn’t I spike it ?!!%$! *throat punches self.

It was also the same week that I decided to make homemade bread crumbs in my blender. Note to self: do not leave lid off blender when making bread crumbs.  The struggle was real.

M Y   S O C K S   T R I E D   T O   M U R D E R   M E

OKAY.  This is based on a mostly true story. Some of this actually happened. My socks kicked my ass and took my name.

M Y    O R I G I N A L    P L A N :

I had big plans.  A while back, I put on my big girl panties and set out to slay some knitting dragons by duct taping my iPhone to the ceiling for a photo sesh (you are so judging me right now, aren’t you?)  That’s cool. I judged my choices too hahaha *palm hits forehead. I had planned on taking 479847511 photos of the blankets, me and the wool, all happy-like.  I was young and stoopid last week.

I know you are secretly-not-so-secretly already laughing at my genius-not-so-genius duct tape contraption. In my defence, I had inhaled copious quantities of motor oil coffee.  Coffee clearly gives my unrealistic expectations.  What I should have been thinking was…

Step aside coffee. This is a job for alcohol.

Everything you need to make theeee most insanely beautiful chunky knit blanket in the history of ever
 Note: missing person in photo above ^^^ !!!!!?#@%
 
I was dead.  Ugh.
Gone. Whooshed. Vanished.
Off my bed. Like a sock loving loser.
Let’s pretend that didn’t happen.
 

 W H A T    actually   H A P P E N E D …

My photo sesh started off pretty sweet.  I stood on my bed, (hyperventilating from excitement) while duct taping my phone to the ceiling. Oh to be a fly on the wall that day.  I bet the flies were even laughing at me.

It seemed the harder I worked, the slower things seemed to go. Am I f’n ancient ? I’ve seen jello move faster.  Apparently I’m 102 years old.

 

Enter total gong show.

I not-so-delicately-nor-lady-like-took-my-phone-off-the-ceiling-while-swiftly-slipping-and-teetering-off-the-edge-of-my-bed-until-I-flipped-in-my-effffing-socks-and-catapulted-directly-and-promptly-while-face-planting-the-floor.

I basically had my ass delivered to me.

 

So I cried.  

That’s what grown ass adults do. #AmIRite ?

The socks survived. My ego. Not so much.  I bruised pretty much every square inch of my body. Including the unmentionables.  Damn it.  I just mentioned the unmentionables *face palm*

After that fall from grace, my face slightly resembled this—> ?!?!?!?!!!!!  I won’t tell you who had a bruised ego, so don’t even try to guess.  It wasn’t me. I swear it.

Now I realize blogging isn’t a glamorous job, but still.  #FML.

Blogging often looks a little like unemployment to your mother and could more accurately be titled “Professional E-Mailer & Couch Potato Who Knits On The Side.”

*finds potato chip in sofa cushion*

But I finally did it !!!!!

Drops the mic. Walks off the stage.
 
 

THE KNIT COLLECTION WAS BORN

{{  Here’s everything you need to make a gorgy gorgeous chunky knit blanket  }}

Make your own chunky knit blanket with this kit !! It's gorgeousness !!

1.

S I M P L E   =    B E T T E R

PATTERNS : I created TWO gorgeous chunky knit blanket patterns for you.   I’m telling ya, some knitting patterns can make you feel like a total incompetent loser. Not this one.  Or this one.  They are ahhhhmaze.

I updated this pattern on the blog to an even more INCREDIBLE pattern with different blanket sizes, knitting tips and secret knitting sauce. The new ebook downloadable pattern is so so so good.

Both chunky knit blanket patterns are instantly downloadable and full of descriptive pics. I don’t want to deflate your love tires but the patterns have knitting pics, not Channing Tatum pics. Whaaaa?!!!  Pattern Bonus :  There are hawt tips like how to join your yarn without weaving or knots!  Tie up loose ends?  N O P E. There’s nothing to tie up.  No yarn ends. No tying.  OMG OMG OMG OMG.

HINT:  every knitter has the potential to unleash this super power. F’REAL.  It’s super EASY too!

 

2.

NEEDLES : The circular knitting needles are the lowest price in the history of ever on my blog!   Start the car!  Start the car!  The needles are super versatile. I use them for easily knitting all my chunky knit blanket projects. They are also great for making knit pillows, scarves and any chunky yarn knitting projects.

 
 
3.
WOOL :  I also found the most beautiful wool on the face of the earth. Annnnd, you will flip-your-ish (JUST DON’T WEAR WOOL SOCKS!) when you see the kit with the wool in it. Erhhhmergerd. BOOM.  We ran out of stock of the soft blue wool (yet you can still special order it here for the sale price for a later delivery in June. ) The 100% Peruvian wool is also available in the most beautiful creamy colour and black too!!

PS. The colours are d’bomb diggity.

 

4.

CHUNKY KNIT BLANKET KIT :  Good things inside

Didja see all those blanket pics up there in the blog post !? ^^  Told ya, a total beaut. You should totally knit one. For fashion, and for crime fighting. I’m losing my mind over it. It’s ridiculous UGH. Dead. I really think you should just go for it.

The chunky knit blanket kits each come  with wool, knitting needles, pattern, swag AND free knitting pattern too!  Sorry to yell. It’s just so good.  So so so good.
 
Make your own chunky knit blanket with this kit !! It's gorgeousness !!
5.

ACCESSORIES :  Pom-poms and tassels are like jewelry for your blanket.  They can really make a blanket POP with pow.  Erhhhmergerd. Tassels. They are the whole giddy up and go go.

Didja know there are pom pom maker kits? Holy batman.  You’re gonna be like, ohgawdthankyou.  Why have I been winding my wool around toilet rolls for years?!

6.

We need to talk about Macrame.  I’m obsessed.  Have you tried it?  Getting inspired here on Pinterest. OMG OMG OMG OMG.

Being a good knitter is 3% talent and 97% not being distracted by the internet

 

We can do this. And by we, I mean you.  Happy knitting!

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Kim Faith

So why or why can I not find 25mm circulars needles in Ontario, Canada???????

Judi Burnes

Ohhhhh Lynne, I ordered the seed stitch blanket kit and received it today. Waited till hubby went to bed before I opened it, hoping he didn’t hear my screeches of delight. But no screeches of delight, instead a long sighhhhhhh of pure bliss when the beautiful grey yarn and I met – it was like nirvana for knitting. I sat there surrounded with all the yarn contemplating just falling asleep right there. And The Needles, the sizzors, the packaging and right before Christmas. My present to me and I deserve it (bad year, hubby hospitalized 5 times, etc). Since I… Read more »

Karen

Hi!
Does the kit include enough yarn to make the tassels?
Thanks,
Karen

Theresa Bilben

I’m soooo saving up for the crazy tassel blankie. Gorgeous!!!
Theresa

Beth

Hi, I love your blog. I subscribed and got a different pattern.. Where is the pattern that isnt knit 4 purl 4 with tassels and not veronica or clara, the one. I’d like is the other cream one that looks like all knit with a bit of a border with a different stitch pattern amd tassles. Maybe you udated it but that is the pattern I’d like.

Deborah Weiss

I love this throw and want to make it for my daughter who just moved to London UK. I would like to make it in pale/medium grey with white and red flecks (heathered sort of). Can I use 3 strands of chunky grey and add one strand of thin red wool and one strand of thin white wool? Would that achieve the look or would it just look like a dog’s breakfast?

hi Lynne, Wow, I can’t believe it! I never win anything. I’m so grateful-this is exciting! I’m so looking forward to using this amazing kit to make a blanket that I can curl up under. It’s been awhile since I made anything, so I’m really looking forward to making a beautiful blanket, and learning something new. I might even let four crazy kids curl up under there with me! I’m sure they’ll want me to show them how to knit their own blankets as soon as they see me doing it…they are a creative bunch…this will be inspirational! It’s been… Read more »

Tamara Creel

Congratulations Anna!!!
Woot Woot!!!!

hi Tamara,

Thanks!!

Anna

Kudos and cupcakes, Anna, and Happy Knitting!

hi Melanie,

Thanks!

Anna

Jo Fleming

Super thoughts – now I feel fairly normal! I haven’t been out for 10 days (MS) but still managed some knitting. Mind you – wool getting thicker – needle size increasing!!! Those circular needles look fab – on my list as I type!

Many thanks for the humour – we need it to stay sane or not.

Kind thoughts

Jo x

VERY SPECIAL AUNT GAIL

If you truly, truly loved me, and absolutely wanted to make me cry (betcha you can’t) then you would pull up your big girl thong and knit me one of those chunky blankets…..only if you love me….sniff, sniff….xxx or at least convince your Mom to.????

Nean

Holy Thursday Batman! I went into a knitting coma for about four days. I knit a bunch of scarves for an auction we have at our school to raise funds for special items teachers may need throughout the year to improve their students’ educational experience! Hah, that was a mouthful. I wanted to tell you thank you for teaching me how to join my yarn ends so no more tails sticking out! there should never be cat tails in your blankets! I can’t believe I didn’t know how to do that before! What new projects are you up to? I… Read more »

Pam Young

Recently (very recently) I learned to knit and ran across your blog while looking for blanket patterns. Just had to order some big needles from you cause I love the look of these chunky blankets. Happy dance….I received my knitting needles a couple of days ago. Love the way they were packaged (even the mailing envelope looks nice). The bag for the needles, the cute little pom pom and the postcards all add a nice touch, more like a gift than something I ordered. I even have a frame that will work really well for the “I knit. What’s Your… Read more »

Darlene Cass

You are so hilarious always have a smile on my face when I read your Blog! I can relate to your C stories as per a Family member had his Journey with such a difficult illness. Prayers sent your way! As to the Knitting OMG u have encouraged and inspired me to get back to Knitting I made a throw for my Daughter this Easter after finding your Blog and as I am typing this email she sent me a pic that she is off to bed with her new blanket a Mother is always near. Love your Blog, your… Read more »

Jess Bouldin

I simply adore big fluffy blankets! Love, love, love, love! And I’ve only just learned to knit about a year or so ago. So what better combo is there, really? Except pie and ice cream. But I digress. 🙂

Lindsay Palmer

Love these! And of course your stories 😉

Leah

Would love to win that blanket kit! The patterns are amazing!

Toni

This would be amazing!!!!! ????

Jessica

I adore your blog— I feel like you are talking to me in person as I read it! Your home inspires me to put effort into my own. And this blanket- this blanket is EVERYTHING!!!!

Karen

I *love* your patterns… I used one to make a wedding gift for my niece and now want to make one for me!!.

Ingela

I love youre blankets. I wish I was so talented as you are! ❤️

Chantelle

I love this so much. I’ve been knitting since high school because it was a hobby that was controlled, repetitive and therefore soothing for my anxiety.

Sandra

Love a chunky knit blanket!! Need a new knitting project and with my schedule would be finished for next winter with this timeline 😉

Alexia

I love your blanket, yarn, pics, and blog! I have also threadlike enjoyed your instastories of your epic camping trip 🙂 I’d love to have one of these blankets in my home. Your packaging is also beautiful!
Is it really that easy breezy, lemon squeezy?

Po

That’s like the most luxurious blanket I’ve ever seen! Love it!!

Lisa Valentini

Your blankets are so beautiful! I can totally relate to your love of knitting. There are never enough hours in the day to spend on all the knitting projects I dream of completing.

Kelly Kristensen

I love these blankets! So cozy!

Great blanket! Love it ????

Caitlin Mcnama

This is a amazing article. The blankets are sooo beautiful but sooo expensive to buy in a store. Great diy!

Bonnie

Hi Lynn
Love reading your blogs. My daughter and I have incorporated so many of your ideas into our homes . Your sense of humour is so refreshing.
An insanely beautiful chunky blanket would be a welcome project.

Nikki

This is so amazing! I am obsessed with this chunky wool blankets ❤️

Courtenay

Beautiful blankets can’t wait to try out a kit.

Tracie

I need to win that blanket kit!!

El

wow. so cozy and warm. love!

Jackie

Gorgeous blanket! I need this in my new living room. ????????

Oh my… this makes me wish I could knit. One day that Brownie Badge will come my way. So….I need to win one cause knitting it…..well I can make pom poms with wool… but that’s it.

Saying yes to a wool blanket that someone else makes is my favourite way to knit.

Jo-Ann XO

Minhthu Nguyen

So cozy! So lovely! So amaze-balls! ????

Shyna Gawell

❤️❤️ the blanket! Would be AWESOME in my camper???? matches perfectly. Wishing I had half the talent you have.

Colleen Dunaway

Gorgeous blanket for wine country, CA! Love your blog and treehouse! Gorgeous stuff and comfy vibes….love the blanket and hopefully, it’ll inspire me to learn to knit or maybe my husband will learn and it’ll be for me (more likely….he’s super handy and needs to learn to sit). Can’t wait for updates!

Jules

A great blog! I would love to win the blanket kit!

Erin Aadalen

Love the blankets! So cute!

Joanne Bradley

I love your blanket kit ! I would love one! Please!

Amy

Your blog posts always make me laugh so much!

Lori

You are sunshine! Love your Instagram stories and blog.

Kelly

Love your blog ! I made one of your chunky blankets and love it ! I only used 2 skeins at a time instead of 3 because it was my first blanket – thanks for your lovely photos and sense of humor

Stephanie Black

I love your blog and your insta stories m! Especially this weekend in the Airstream! I’m an avid knitter and would love to knit up one of your beautiful patterns. Thanks for the entertaining blogs

Brenda

Love your blog and these this gorgeous yarn. I’m new to knitting and would love to try this.

Donna

I am a subscriber- love your blog and Instagram. I feel your pain and love your humour. I am a knitter and would love to win the kit. Love your design style. Have a great day and keep up the great work. You inspire many

Such beautiful blankets, Lynne.

Tami Eckhardt

Love, Love your knitted creations. Thanks for sharing your tips, trick n’ patterns… which by the way is in my to do list. Could really is this blankie on this chilly spring days!! Thanks Lynne!

Jackie

Loved the chunky blanket and the video, it was a gift for my sister and everyone threatens to steal it! Can’t wait to try your next pattern

Michelle Kania

Lynne,
I found your blog December, 2016 while searching the net; I needed help understand a new knitting pattern (i’m Self taught). Your “chunky wool blanket” pattern was on your blog with a video tutorial. I learned more from your tutorial then any other video, u tube video or FB. When my friends saw the blankets they wanted me to teach them which of course I did. So, thanks again for your knowledge, teaching skills and patience.
With love,
Michelle
P.s. I did purchase one of kits but would love love love to win one!,!! ????

Jo

Spreading the knitting love from over the ocean in the borders of Scotland! Thank you for sharing your wonderful soul too; Life’s rich but often wonky tapestry 🙂 x

Patty

Hey Lynne: Oh the trials we go through when we are committed to an idea! But knitting is still a great escape and so relaxing! My hubby made some BIG needles for me….I am ready to tackle a beautiful blanket! Love your blog….life is a wild ride! Be careful out there!

Donna

Hi Lynne, thanks so much for your funny blogs and seriously great info and ideas. So glad that your socks didn’t completely murder you. Thanks for the opportunity to win this contest and to be a part of your tight knit (ing) group. Take care and wear shoes!

Lynne Johns

Amazing blog, always gives me a lift and makes me laugh. Beautiful blankets !!

Sarah

This is just the blanket that I need, really need, for cold Boston winters. I will have my mother make it for me if I win it (and I know that she will do it!)

Naomi

The blankets are beautiful and cushy looking (that’s good!). I WANT to make one!!!

Hannah McGregor-Shenton

I love these blankets and cushions, they are so beautiful! I really can’t wait until I get my act together and make one!

Alli

I would love to win this blanket kit!! I’ve been dying to try your pattern out and this would be a fantastic opportunity for me to be able to do so!

Angela Gregorio

I want to knit this blanket sooo bad! It’s perfect!

Julie

These look amazing!! I hope this is something a beginning knitter could handle!
I would love to win this kit.

Linda

Hey girl!!! I need to win this!! I’ll be crossing my fingers and toes. ????

SjP

Just love it all! Keep up the hilarious posts and send me that blanket!

Kat

I love your chunky blanket patterns! ????????

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