DIY toilet spray: Erhhmergerd, sh*t happens

Mar 4

Have you ever tried Poo-Pourri ?  It works.  It fools the world into thinking that your poop doesn’t stink.  PooPourri essentially traps the poopy stench beneath the surface of the toilet bowl water and releases only fancy-schmancy smells into the air.

Guess whaaaa?  I have a recipe to make your own homemade version.  It’s amazing. Stamped it.

Your nose will thank you for the rest of your ever loving life.

Even though Poo Pourri works, I wanted to create one with my fave essential oil combinations.  Making your own toilet spray saves a lot of moola and this DIY version also smells amazeballs.   Commercial aerosol sprays make me gag.  This spray makes me happy.  Gospel truth.

I also like a good challenge.  This challenge was a  $#%@@!*! doozy.  So worth it!!

Essential oil bathroom spray : STOPS the bathroom smell.

Aerosol Fragrance Sprays: Attempt to cover it up.

Supplies needed:

2 oz  Glass bottle ( blue or amber )

Essential oils:  bergamot + lemongrass + ylang ylang 

Vodka or distilled water

Liquid soap

Bonus:  You will never have to die a thousand deaths again when you walk by the bathroom after your hubby was ‘reading the paper’

You’re welcome.


Have I just scared you off with all this shitty talk? Getting ready to delete me from your blog reader?  Well then.

Let’s talk crap.

So we can all come out smelling like roses.

Roses are red, violets are blue
Spray this in the bowl before you poo


The proof:

I’ve tested this toilet spray for over a year in my bathroom very scientific laboratory.   I’ve tested it  Public bathrooms.   Airplanes.  Strangers bathrooms.  Hotel rooms.  Strangers walking in the mall.  The grocery store clerk.   Kidding.  Not kidding.


How to use toilet spray:

When you are ready for the call of the wild…SHAKE THE BOTTLE…. then spritz 5 sprays into the toilet bowl on to the water’s surface before you go.  Before. Before. Before.  Got it?  Spray before you uhhhhm, pay your taxes.  Just spray before you pay your dues to the country club. 

Use the almighty throne accordingly.  Ewwww.  Why are we talking about this?  The essential oil spray will create a barrier and trap the gahhhh odour under the surface.  It’s like magic.  Legit.  No stinky poop molecule smells will permeate your bathroom.

Nothing. Nada.  Zip.

This is what bathroom dreams are made of

I feel like every woman who lives with a man should have this spray in her life.  If a guy is reading this, please disregard.  We all know that women do not have smelly poop.  We poop rosy roses.  We are perfect.  Angelic, really.  ‘Nuff said.  Men ohhhhh Men are notorious for detonating some seriously foul bathroom bombs.  You know it.   So shut it.

OMG shit happens via @lynneknowlton DESIGN THE LIFE YOU WANT TO LIVE

I’m also the type of person that, if I need to poop (which I don’t, because I’m a lady)  I would hold it for days if I was staying at someone else’s house, traveling or in any public place for that matter.  This spray saved my poopy life.  Sorry if I just scarred you for life, while talking about bowel movements.  I just grossed myself out.

How to make a homemade version of Poopourri

Are you still with me?  Or are you looking for the  Please don’t delete me from your life. Your nose will be forever grateful.

Think of this spray like a force field and poop is the cannon ball.

I also hate it when other people poop in my house. I hate knowing that their stinky poop molecules are floating around my living space slowly ruining my life and existence.

I keep a bottle of this in every bathroom that they may grace.  I tuck one in their back pocket, of course, when they aren’t looking.

I then fling my head back and say “Who did that?!!”  I have no idea how that bottle landed in your life and pocket.  Shut it. Use it.

Make your own essential oil toilet spray

I promise, this recipe is crap-tastic. Wait. Did you leave?

Your work bathroom

I’m considering putting one in every public bathroom, for those who insist on going in a public place.  I feel it’s the responsible thing to do and eventually I’ll get promoted to Queen of the Universe, because I took action.

Natural DIY toilet spray and printable labels

Which essential oils are essential to use?

Okay, let’s just rip off the bandaid and get this over with. Some peeps get their knickers in a twist about what brand of essential oil to use.   Here’s the deal.  Don’t use fragrance oils (the fake version of an essential oil that smells like cheap perfume.) You also don’t have to use top-drawer-back-of-the-bus-best-of-the-best essential oils either.  It’s not like you are going to eat this stuff.  Please don’t.  Now you are grossing me out.  haha.

Use pure essential oils.  Pure, but it doesn’t have to be perfectly pure, pure, angelic pure, blessed by the monks of the bohemian land and costing a billion trillion dollars.

I personally use whatever essential oils are in my cupboard.

So far, my faves have been NOW essential oils…lavender, ylang ylang, lemongrass, bergamot, rose, lemon and this variety pack.  They seem to be the most affordable, good quality and do the trick.

I also ordered these and lurvvvvve the variety (except the pink grapefruit.)  That is the only one in the mix that made me yack.

What scent to use?

You can totally experiment with different oils to get that exact scent you want.  Definitely, most definitely at least use lemongrass oil as one of the oils in your mixture.   It is the magical secret essential oil ingredient.

I usually add in something with citrus-i-ness (why isnt that a word? It should totally be a word) in it, like orange, grapefruit or lemon.

Because I’m a total bohemian weirdo, I prefer a slightly sensual scent for my toilet sprays too. I almost always add Ylang Ylang essential oil into pretty much everything I make because it is my all time fave scent in the history of ever.

Don’t tell the authorities.

Just remember the most important essential oil in this recipe ->  LEMONGRASS.

Do it.

It’s necessary for the call of the wild.

Natural DIY toilet spray and printable labels

Want Gorgy Gorgeous Labels?  

No problemo.  I printed mine and glued them onto the bottles, because I’m a jerk and didn’t think about ordering labels online.

I eventually gave in and ordered these white glossy, circular labels on Amazon, mostly because I wanted to appear all profeshhhional.

The printables fit perfectly on the Avery labels or you can just print on paper like I did and glue the paper labels on to the bottle.  Bamn.  Done.

Click here for recipe and labels.

Free downloadable recipe and printable labels for toilet spray

You’re like,


Boom.  You did it, ya dang hippie.

Imagine where you can go now 🙂

Do you have a fave recipe with essential oils?  Spill.  I just may start a series on the blog with my fave essential oil recipes for body lotions, cleaning supplies,  bubble bath, candles.. the whole shebang!  I’ve been slowly converting my life over to essential-oil-ness.

It’s so so good.  Sofa-king good.



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  1. lynneknowlton

    June 26th, 2016 at 8:00 pm

    Erhhmergerd, sh*t happens: DIY toilet spray

  2. Willy

    August 10th, 2016 at 12:46 pm

    It shall be vital for any marketing supervisor to
    have a bachelor’s degree in advertising.

  3. Tam

    December 12th, 2016 at 3:14 pm

    Just tripped on this blog and it has kept me entertained!! haha good job!

  4. Lynne Knowlton

    February 6th, 2017 at 12:37 pm

    Happy to have you here Tam! Here’s to more laughs together…

    Lynne 🙂

  5. Alyssa Clingan

    March 1st, 2017 at 3:30 am

    I just happened upon your blog and I’m so glad I found you. Must have been fate because we so could be besties ?. You crack me up and I love your DIY ideas, so doing the grapevine balls and toilet spray. Look forward to more great idea and lots of laughs.

  6. Messy Jessie

    April 25th, 2017 at 9:09 pm

    okay. I think I’m in love with you and your hysterical humor. In a totally plutonic way of course…obv’s because I’ve never met u in real life….at least I don’t think I have. Thanks a TON for this post. I work in the health care field and am completing my internship at a nursing and rehab facility to get my OTA degree and certification. {bonus points if anyone reading this knows what OT’s do and what OT/OTA stands for! 😛 } and I decided to make this as a gag gift for the other therapists i’ve been working with! They will love the labels!!! {and hopefully not shit themselves with laughter when i give it to them!}

    thanks for being awesome.
    love, peace and pretty poo’s!

  7. Freya Tennessee

    September 27th, 2017 at 7:45 am

    ran over your blog by accident, so delightful 🙂 Thank you for putting smiles on our faces.
    Would you share the quantity of drops you are using?

    have wonderful days!

  8. Annamay

    January 14th, 2018 at 9:02 am

    Hello! I found you and I’m so glad I did! You made me smile first thing in a Sunday morning. I’m not smiling much these days. I’m old and getting older by the minute. I have recently begun knitting again after an absence of years. I knit blankets. Simple knits only these days.
    But I digress. I appreciate the recipe for the poop problems. My husband is ill. Poop and accompanying scents are a problem. Thanks. I’m going to drink my tea now.

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