This week has been a flaming hot mess and I was wrecked.

Wrecking Ball. WRECKED 

Have you ever had one of those weeks, and it has only just begun?  You know the kind.

The kind where you want to have a cigarette and a nap, and you don’t even smoke.

I’ve been there, done that, and got the poster this week and it’s only hump day.  H.E.L.P.

 

What   happened  ?

My site crashed and I was in a shit storm <—- I screamed that.

 

BAD:   It has been a snow day here for three.days.in.a.row.  I could seriously punch a snowman in the face right now … if only I could see 3 inches in front of my face.  I considered running over a snowman’s face with my car.  #CanadianProblems

 

GOOD :   Google Plus made this Auto Awesome for me.  I think I love you Google Plus.  Helloooo,  it adds snow to photos automatically.

Wait a sec.  More snow?

I have two words for that, and they’re not let’s dance @!#*

 

Holy  Batman

 

The worst part of my week :  My site crashed yesterday.

Crash.  Bang.  Boom. 

In the toilet.

Gonzo.

I’ve had bursts of traffic on my site and the whole thing just had enough.  I know.  #FirstWorldProblem

It spit smoke and sputtered.

It was worse than bad.  It was negative good.

 

Look   What   Happened  !@&%! :

 

 

That is what you call a bloggers nightmare.

It has never ever in the history of the universe happened to me. #BloggingPanicAttack

Okay, okay… I’ve had a zillion blogging panic attacks, but never have I had ZERO in my google analytics.

This is why I drink.  I considered having Baileys for breakfast all week this morning.

The best part about the shitastrophy shit storm :

 

Waylay Design pulled my site out of the gutter.   They are so lucky that they live in Vegas.  I would wet kiss them all the live long day if they were standing in front of me. They are the best thing that has ever happened to my blog.  Hands down.  The best web design team evahhh and they are really nice peeps too.  They are my pals.

 

So what did I do?  I needed to chill it, man.

 

Knitting   Saved   My   Sanity :

 

I picked up my knitting needles again.  Don’t ask me why, but knitting relaxes me.

This happened :

 

 

I think I knit the blanket, so I could curl up and forget-ta-bout-it-all.

PS.  I made the pattern up in my head.  I can’t believe I had any head space to do that.

Truth is, it is so easy, a toddler could knit it.

I was sort of feeling like a toddler… a little overwhelmed and about to have a temper tantrum.

 

 

Want the pattern? Let me know in the comments and I may just do a bloggy post about it.  It is great for reducing temper tantrums stress and increasing sanity.

One stitch at a time.

I have no idea why this next photo makes the chunky wool blanket look so small.  It’s freaking massive.  The knitting needles alone are the size of broomstick handles.  And you think I joke.

 

 

In  a  Nutshell …

 

My week has been a great big cluster-you-know-what-er and I needed a big fat belly laugh.  HUGE.

Naturally, I couldn’t have a mental breakdown and then a bust a gut laugh without you.

Are you ready for it?  Go to the washroom first or #YouWillPeeYourPants

If you haven’t seen the original Miley Cyrus video … watch this first.  You need to do that.  It will make the next belly laugh make sooooooo much more sense.

 

Ready  ?

This. Oh this video. You will be all kinds of weirded out AND laughing, all at once.

I laughed so hard that tears streamed down my face.

Note :  This is not for a young audience.  Avert your eyes, if you don’t want to see nakedness.

This video is for anyone who wants to wreck themselves laughing :

 

 

Are you dying from laughter?  You’re welcome.  I love you like that.

Have a beautifully funny day !

PS.  I created all the photos on the blog post this week with my cell phone and these apps.  Why?  Because I was a hot mess and couldn’t hold a real camera.  So there.