Sing along with me :
You and Me…
Sitting in a tree.
K – I – S S – I – N – G
Never mind about the rest of that song, it doesn’t really work here. I don’t want to have a baby with you. I just want to know more about you.
Let’s swap stories.
I’ll tell you about me. You tell me about you.
Deal? Deal.
Let's get this partaaay started.
1. I almost died. Three times*
* As if once wasn’t enough. Geesh.
First time : In a helicopter crash when I was 18 years old. The helicopter fuel was contaminated with rain water. Guess what happens when water and fuel separate? You hear the pilot say “mayday – mayday.” Then, you drop like a leaf.
Second time : With two suspected terrorists on an aircraft (the aircraft we were on was eventually followed by fighter jets). No joke. If things turned cray-cray, they would have shot us down. Luckily, with the help of my husband, it was all okay. After landing, the two men were escorted off the plane by very big burly SWAT team.
Third time : As a young gal, I backed my brand new car into the neighbours car before I even had a driver’s license. I had owned the car for about 10 minutes. My parents came pretty close to killing me. I died. A thousand deaths.
2. I like designing a life that has a filter on it. An instagram filter. Life is just prettier that way.
3. Hammock = My happy place.
I have regrets about not laying in it often enough. It stares at me like the books on my night stand. Just waiting to be read. Bastards.
4. Pet peeve : When people chew food with their mouth open. I have an automatic reflex that makes me want to throat punch them.
5. It makes me sad when I see people in chemotherapy alone. So I talk to them. Fuck cancer and the horse it rode in on.
6. I hate water. So I put this in it. That works for me. I drink it every day.
7. When I do things, I like to go all Beyoncé on it. Full out. Anything else is like being kinda pregnant.
8. My car is a think tank. It’s a licensed thinking weapon. A creative time machine. It’s the place where I pull ideas out of my wazoo. I know. I shock myself sometimes. It surprises me when I get to my destination and wonder how the heck I got there.
9. Don’t talk to me until I have had my energy mud in the morning. I don’t care if it tastes like motor oil. I need it. Until then, my eyes glaze over. I am not fit to discuss matters with. No really. Stand back. Or prepare for the stink eye.
10. I get juiced every morning.
Juicing and wheat grass are my dope. This is my favourite juicer.
Juicing has been life changing for me. Bring it.
11. I’ve been known to have a temper tantrum when my house isn’t clean. A messy house makes me feel kind of scratchy.
I believe our home tells the story of who we are.
12. I like mine to tell the story of cleanliness, organization, simplicity and luuuurve. A space free of clutter. Except my drawers and my cupboards. They are a wild flurry of messiness. My closets are a hot mess. I’m lazy with those. Amen. I confessed it.
Perhaps … if this hawt guy came and helped me organize my closet … I would be more…well… organized.
I’d also like to have a spin on that motorcycle.
13. I believe that all women should have a friend that will clean out their drawer of unmentionables when they die. Nuff said. This is my friend for that embarrassing wee task:
I truly love my pal Norma.
I don't always know where I'm going, but I know where I belong. With my family and friends.
14. Childhood memories : I can’t believe I wrote this list and forgot to add a glowworm to it. I remembered to write the fact that I dreamt of running down the aisle of The Price is Right. I must have written my 36 childhood memories on an etch a sketch when I wrote that list.
15. As the famous Jim Rohn once said: “You’re the average of the five people you spend the most time with.”
This is who I spend the most time with :
16. I’m Canadian. I love snow on the first day when it blankets everything in a soft velvety cover of white glory. That is where the love affair ends. Please feel terribly sorry for me. Thank you.
17. On a typical day, my hairy legs are my only link to reality. I daydream ideas. A lot. I like to.
18. I have champagne taste and a beer bottle pocketbook.
19. I have the attention span of a cocker spaniel puppy when I am forced to read a manual or listen to voice mail.
Do you know what is great about voice mail? Neither do I.
Voicemail = Jail.
20. I write like I talk. The benefit of that is that you don’t get talkers block.
21. I don’t like having neighbours. Not that I have neighbours. But still.
22. I dislike close up mirrors. I feel like I’m looking through binoculars at Jurassic Park.
23. On my bucket list: A vacation home in a beach hut on the ocean. Do you have a beach hut that you want to share with sugar bear? I can babysit it for you. I can’t promise that I won’t redecorate it. I did it before, and I’ll do it again.
Barter anyone?
24. I have four kids. I LOVE them and I LIKE them.
J’adore with all my heart and soul.
25. When things in life go all sideways and wrong, I feel it deeply. I am practicing the art of learning how to shake it off. Shake. Shake. Shake. Boogie.
26. Some people are negative assholes. I’d like to clock them. I try to distance myself as much as possible from negative people. They make me bat shit crazy.
27. I’m a lover of all things awesome. It excites me. I light up like a Christmas tree.
28. I have psychic abilities. I know what you are doing right now. You are reading this blog. I’m smart like that.
29. Music moves me. <- Pink is one of my fave artists.
PS. I’m an excellent singer and dancer. When I’m alone. Then. And only then.
30. I am grateful to be alive.*
Every day is a good day.
Every. Single. Day.
Why? Refer back to number 1 *
Raise your hand if you can tell me a few things about you !
Okay, put your hand down.
Type.
Live the life you love and love the life you live.
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